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30

Jul

dailydreamqueen:

Warehouse 13: Helena and her little girl. Such a sad story :(

First Scenes - Claudia Donovan

Claudia:
I can't lie like this anymore
Artie:
Are you saying it was you?
Claudia:
I feel horrible. I should have said something before, but I was afraid of what you'd-
Artie:
-It's OK-
Claudia:
No. Let me get this off my chest. It was me. I helped Macpherson get into the Warehouse.
Artie:
Why?
Claudia:
I don't know. Why does anybody do anything?
Artie:
What are you talking about?
Claudia:
I'm a madwoman Artie, and it doesn't stop with helping Macpherson.
Artie:
What do you mean?
Claudia:
Check my room at Leena's. They'll find the Lindburgh baby in the closet. Also some post-its reminding me where I put Jimmy Hoffa.
Artie:
Get. Out.
Claudia:
I framed Roger Rabbit.
Jinx:
Seems I've apparently been sent from Rome to Germany to chauffeur you and since Mrs. F isn't exactly a chatterbox would care to tell me what we're doing?
Claudia:
We have to find the Chinese Orchid before Artie gets the dagger. If we don't he will release the sweating sickness, we'll have to give him the Astrolabe, he'll turn back time, the Warehouse won't exist anymore, you'll be dead, the world will lose hope and descend into chaos and despair. You want more? I had a lot of caffeine on the plane. In the 16th century 4th group of Ganja(?), a Spanish Jesuit-
Jinx:
Stop! You had me at you'll be dead. Now where are we going?
Claudia:
Warehouse 8. Well at least what used to be Warehouse 8 to snag the Chinese Orchid before it causes a deadly plague.
Jinx:
Okay so where's Warehouse 8-Wait, wait, wait- Pete and Myka get a dagger and we get a plague? When do we stop being the B Team?
Claudia:
We are not the B Team. Fool we are the second A Team. We can't go after the dagger because Artie had a dream I was going to stab him with it. So that's why we're the ones going after a plague to kill all of humanity.
Jinx:
...Thank you. I feel better.
Claudia:
Get a job.
Joshua:
Oh, get a job? Just get a job? Why don't I just strap on my job helmet and squeeze down into a job cannon and FIRE OFF INTO JOB LAND WHERE JOBS GROW ON JOBBIES?
Steve:
Are you eating a salad?
Artie:
Yeah.
Steve:
Why?
Artie:
'Cause I am.
Steve:
I don't think I've ever seen you eat a salad. What kind of salad is it?
Artie:
I don't know.
Steve:
Just mixed greens?
Artie:
I don't know what kind of salad it is. I'm eating a salad, okay? I'm doing it. Do I have to know the names? There's no difference between them. It's a bowl of weeds. Some of them have cheese. This isn't the kind with cheese. Does that answer your question?